


A Review of "Santa Claus is Goin' to High School" by Professor Henry Hidgens

by hellsteeth



Category: Black Friday - Team StarKid, The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals - Team StarKid
Genre: Gen, archive warning for being pedantic, he has Thoughts about movie musicals and must tell the world
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-03
Updated: 2020-03-03
Packaged: 2021-02-27 23:28:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22993951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hellsteeth/pseuds/hellsteeth
Summary: To: The Hatchetfield Gazette (hatchetfieldgazette@gmail.com)From: Professor Henry Hidgens (hhidgens@hcc.edu)Subject: A Musical Review (no pun intended)To Whom It May Concern:I would like to submit this review of “Santa Claus is Goin’ to High School” for publication in the Hatchetfield Gazette. I do not need compensation, I simply believe that people should be informed before they spend nearly two hours watching this movie. I believe my perspective could shed some light on this movie, as well as the concept of movie-musicals in general. Please let me know what you think.Yours truly,Prof. Henry HidgensBiology DepartmentHatchetfield Community College(1 attachment)
Comments: 19
Kudos: 127





	A Review of "Santa Claus is Goin' to High School" by Professor Henry Hidgens

To: The Hatchetfield Gazette (hatchetfieldgazette@gmail.com) 

From: Professor Henry Hidgens (hhidgens@hcc.edu) 

Subject: A Musical Review (no pun intended)

To Whom It May Concern:

I would like to submit this review of “Santa Claus is Goin’ to High School” for publication in the Hatchetfield Gazette. I do not need compensation, I simply believe that people should be informed before they spend nearly two hours watching this movie. I believe my perspective could shed some light on this movie, as well as the concept of movie-musicals in general. Please let me know what you think.

Yours truly,

Prof. Henry Hidgens

Biology Department

Hatchetfield Community College

(1 attachment)

**“Santa Claus is Goin’ to High School” has the holiday spirit, but does it have what it takes to be a true musical?**

Professor Henry Hidgens

There’s nothing quite like a movie about Santa Claus posing as a high school student to tell the world that the holiday season really is in full swing. The yearly holiday film cash grab is just as much a staple of the holiday season as the sickenly-sweet specialty coffees and fairy lights on every imaginable outdoor surface. “Santa Claus is Goin’ to High School” is certainly not going to win any awards, but it delivers on its promise of being a fun holiday musical.

Despite being countless centuries old, Chris Kringle is the picture of youth, popularity and jolliness. I like to think that I see something of myself in him! He walks the line between an aged, mythical holiday icon and a high school student flawlessly. However, his relationship with Noelle is somewhat unsettling. I wish that they had focused on the friendship between Chris Kringle and the other members of the Northville High School basketball team more instead. Who doesn’t love a good story about pals tossing the ball around, saving Christmas together?

The big musical number, “Deck the Halls (of Northville High)”, is a wonderful ensemble piece that moves the plot of the film forward with the introduction of Jingle and Jangle, two elves sent to aid Chris in his mission. The music is energizing and instantly memorable and the choreography is expertly performed. The song will have you cheering Chris on from your seat (much to the annoyance of your fellow movie-goers, I might add).

Unfortunately, despite the catchy tunes and delightful choreography of “Santa Claus is Goin’ to High School”, the film contains a fatal flaw that I simply cannot see past. As I sat in the Lakeside Mall Cineplex, staring up at the screen, it was glaringly obvious that what was missing from the performances was the presence of human beings. 

Since the invention of the camera and the advent of sound recording, mankind has strived to capture the experience of watching a musical on film, forcing a three-dimensional, engaging experience onto a two-dimensional screen. For this reason, just like the screen, “Santa Claus is Goin’ to High School” falls flat. 

Despite having a background in biology, I’ve always fancied myself a connoisseur of musical theatre (my own musical is currently in the works). This love for the craft is something of a double-edged sword. It allows me to appreciate the fine work of the performers, the creativity and passion behind the music and choreography and the emotional to and fro of the plot (I laughed and cried in equal measure). However, I simply could not see past the fact that this “musical” is nothing but an imitation of the true joy that a live musical can bring to an audience.

There is something to be said for experiencing a musical in person. The hush that falls over the crowd as the lights dim! The laughs and shouts from the audience! The feeling of community! The knowledge that in that precise moment, these skilled performers and sharing their gifts with you! The envy you feel, wishing that you could be up on that stage, performing and singing your heart out (or is that just me?)!

For all of the holiday joy and energy in “Santa Claus is Goin’ to High School”, I could not find a shred of sincerity. If you’re trying to decide between remaining in your apocalypse-ready bunker and traveling to the Lakeside Mall to see this movie, I would recommend staying in and asking Alexa to choose a different movie for you to watch. This one will surely be on Amazon Prime soon, anyway.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Let me know what you think and hang out with me at hells--teeth on tumblr!


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